Dating What are your dating deal breakers?

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What are your dating deal breakers?

A few years ago, I found myself walking out of a pub in Cambridge. This isn’t all that remarkable seeing as I lived nearby, and frequented the pub more often than I should probably admit. On this occasion, however, I was walking out on a first date for the first time in my life.

We’d met online. We’d spoken – albeit briefly – on the phone. He was busy studying and looking for love. I was busy working and looking for the same. We’d hit it off and planned a mid-week dinner at the Eagle (if you ever visit Cambridge, you really should go). Just 30 minutes after meeting, however, and I was on my way home.

Why, I hear you ask? He wasn’t married; I’m pretty sure he wasn’t gay; he didn’t have bad breath; and he’d even bought the first round of drinks. So far so good. So why didn’t I give the evening – and my date – a chance?

When you meet a potential partner, there are certain idiosyncrasies that can send you running. And not towards each other. It might be bad taste in clothes; a different religious background; an age difference you can’t compute; or simply the fact that he’s shorter than you. Dating deal breakers are ultimately very personal – what matters to one person might not matter to another.

For me, the absence of any semblance of a sense of humour had me hastening for the exit.

The good news is that, according to a survey by eHarmony, men and women – on the whole – tend to agree about what makes a great potential mate… and what doesn’t.

Like me, most men and women look for a ‘great sense of humour’ (that’s a GSOH for those looking for love online), someone who is kind, who communicates well and who is loyal. On the other hand, no one wants a partner prone to lying, cheating, rude behaviour and drug use. That, it seems, we can all agree on.

However, for women at least, the study revealed a number of other tendencies that could sound the death knoll for any potential relationship.

1. A wandering eye – eyes that flicker too regularly from their date to passing women is a definite dating deal breaker thanks to the fact it can lead some women to feel insecure around their man.

2. Trying too hard – we know their heart is in the right place, but trying too hard can achieve the opposite. If a man suggests meeting the parents during the very first date he’s likely not going to win a second chance.

3. Bragging – Talking about possessions can indicate an obsession with ‘stuff’. Not too many women are thrilled about the prospect of being considered a possession.

4. Infidelity – bringing up former misdemeanours during a date is the fourth most common dating deal breaker according to eHarmony.

5. Hung up on the ex – Discussing past relationships – what you’ve learned from them – can be a healthy endeavour. But name dropping a particular ex every two minutes is one of the most common dating deal breakers for women.

Do you agree? What are your dating deal breakers? Share your experiences below.

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About the Author

Lizzy has more than ten years’ experience in the print and digital publishing arena and is the Editor at Single File. Having moved from the UK to Australia in 2008, Lizzy has worked for a number of leading publishers in Sydney and has particular expertise in the health, wellness and travel markets. If you have any questions for Lizzy, you can send them across by email to

2 Responses to What are your dating deal breakers?

  1. Pingback: What are your dating deal breakers? | Lizzy Wood

  2. I really appreciate what you post. You have a new subscriber now.

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